Tag: news

absurd politics, America, Fuck Yeah!, Artificial Stupidity, Dysfunctional Technology, federal agencies, Government, Military & Foreign Policy, National Security, Politics, Secondhand Service, State vs. Federal Politics, Washington absurdity

Hegseth Cuts Generals, Pentagon Quietly Replaces Them With Super Intelligence Bots That Already Finished World War III Before Lunch

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth is planning a 20% reduction in general and flag officer positions by January 2027. In their place, the Pentagon is introducing Super Intelligence Bots, designed to fulfill traditional roles and reduce bureaucracy. Despite criticism on losing experienced officers, the bots are improving efficiency and proposing further staff cuts. Continue reading Hegseth Cuts Generals, Pentagon Quietly Replaces Them With Super Intelligence Bots That Already Finished World War III Before Lunch

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Elections, Internet Meltdowns, Maryland, maryland man, Online Abuse, Politics, Press & Free Speech, social media

Facebook Man Writes 1,200-Word Constitutional Defense After Discovering Internet Satire Exists

A Maryland Facebook political page reacted dramatically to online jokes about Rep. Jamie Raskin, with a member crafting an extensive defense that could rival a Supreme Court brief. This humorous overreaction highlighted how internet satire is sometimes misunderstood, generating an absurd discourse around Raskin that included exaggerated claims and a comical analysis of memes. Continue reading Facebook Man Writes 1,200-Word Constitutional Defense After Discovering Internet Satire Exists

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absurd politics, Conspiracies, Conspiracy Theories, Culture & Absurdity, Donald Trump, Entertainment, Government, Lawfare Warfare, Politics, Sports & Whatever, State vs. Federal Politics, Westley Watende Omari Moore

Maryland Attorney General Sues MLB, Claims Trump Must Have Colluded to Keep Orioles Out of Playoffs

Maryland Attorney General Anthony Brown has filed an emergency lawsuit against Major League Baseball after the Orioles were eliminated from postseason contention. Brown’s complaint suggests external interference, notably implicating Donald Trump. The lawsuit seeks to award the Orioles a Wild Card spot and questions the fairness of MLB standings, citing alleged discriminatory practices. Continue reading Maryland Attorney General Sues MLB, Claims Trump Must Have Colluded to Keep Orioles Out of Playoffs

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California, crime, Crime Beat, Criminal Court, Drugs, Gangs & Cults, Judicial

Accused Cocaine Kingpin Arrives in California, Immediately Asks Where to Pick Up His Welcome Basket

An alleged international drug kingpin known as “Spider” arrived in California expecting punishment but was offered various welfare benefits instead. He humorously applied for housing, healthcare, and even cosmetic surgery while learning he would face probation. This bizarre encounter highlighted California’s lenient approach to crime, leaving Spider bewildered by the system. Continue reading Accused Cocaine Kingpin Arrives in California, Immediately Asks Where to Pick Up His Welcome Basket

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2026 Midterms Guide, absurd politics, Campaigns, Democrazy, Elections, Politics, voter outreach

Nation Launches Search for Mysterious Americans Who Apparently Answer Political Polls

Authorities in the U.S. are humorously searching for the elusive “Poll People,” individuals who respond to political surveys. Despite claims of significant polling data, no one seems to know these respondents personally. This raises skepticism about the validity of polling, making many question who these survey participants truly are. Continue reading Nation Launches Search for Mysterious Americans Who Apparently Answer Political Polls

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Global News, Government, Government Dysfunction, Iran, journalism, Media Critique, Military & Foreign Policy, Missing Persons, Nuclear War, Politics, Washington absurdity, Washington DC, World Dominance, world leaders

Iranian President Says Supreme Leader Is Perfectly Healthy, Just Living Like Bigfoot With a Nuclear Program

Iranian President Masoud Pezeshkian reassured Bret Baier of Supreme Leader Mojtaba Khamenei’s health despite his long absence from public view, attributing it to security reasons. Pezeshkian denied Iran’s interest in nuclear weapons, even as uranium enrichment reached 60%, and stated the country seeks peace, not conflict with the U.S. Continue reading Iranian President Says Supreme Leader Is Perfectly Healthy, Just Living Like Bigfoot With a Nuclear Program

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, affordability, aquatics, bureaucracy, Campaigns, Celebrity, Elections, Government, Government Dysfunction, Government Waste, Maryland, Politics, State & Local, Taxes & Fees, Westley Watende Omari Moore

Dan Cox Promises Triple Lindy From Governor’s Mansion If Maryland Elects Him

Republican gubernatorial candidate Dan Cox plans to perform the daring Triple Lindy dive from a makeshift platform at the Maryland State House if elected. He aims to symbolize his rejection of conventional politics through this stunt, but it raises safety concerns and logistical questions about feasibility and landing. Continue reading Dan Cox Promises Triple Lindy From Governor’s Mansion If Maryland Elects Him

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, America, Fuck Yeah!, Animals, Congress, Congress & Power, Government, Politics, State vs. Federal Politics, Washington absurdity, Washington DC

Senate Celebrates National Decline With Capitol Hill Dog Birthday Party While Voter ID Sits in the Yard

The U.S. Senate hosted a lavish birthday party for a dog, highlighting Congress’s tendency to prioritize entertainment over crucial issues like voter ID. Attendees celebrated the pet with cake and photos, while important legislative matters were ignored. This event raised questions about accountability and priorities in Washington, evident as the public grows frustrated. Continue reading Senate Celebrates National Decline With Capitol Hill Dog Birthday Party While Voter ID Sits in the Yard

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
2026 Midterms Guide, absurd politics, Campaigns, Conspiracies, Conspiracy Theories, Democrazy, Elections, Gangs & Cults, Global News, Government, israel, Maryland, National Security, Politics, Secret Agents & Spies, State & Local, voter outreach

Montgomery County GOP Hits Emergency Eject Button After Candidate Announces Mossad Apparently Runs Rockville

The Montgomery County Republican Party swiftly distanced itself from candidate Harold Maldonado after he claimed Mossad secretly influenced local officials. Following his alarming accusations regarding various community issues, the party removed him from their voter guide and implemented stricter vetting for candidates, leading residents to feel relieved about the situation. Continue reading Montgomery County GOP Hits Emergency Eject Button After Candidate Announces Mossad Apparently Runs Rockville

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Campaigns, censorship, Communism, Socialism, What's the difference?, Community Guidelines, Conspiracies, Conspiracy Theories, Elections, Ethics for 100, fraud, Gender Studies, Health & Medical, journalism, Maryland, Media Critique, Missing Persons, People & Personalities, Politics, Press & Free Speech, social media, State & Local, voter outreach

Jawando Too Delicate for Debate After Heroic Primary Victory Over 11,000 People

Democratic County Executive nominee Will Jawando will not debate Republican Esther Wells, citing past engagements and significant differences in vote counts. His campaign emphasizes that numerous previous forums have provided sufficient candidate comparison, and that Jawando, recovering from a heart attack, intends to focus on future goals rather than a debate perceived as unnecessary. Continue reading Jawando Too Delicate for Debate After Heroic Primary Victory Over 11,000 People

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