Category: Government

2026 Midterms Guide, absurd politics, Congress, Congress & Power, Conspiracies, Conspiracy Theories, Democrazy, Government, Government Dysfunction, Health & Medical, Kentucky, Missing Persons, Politics, Washington absurdity, Washington DC

Mitch McConnell Missing From Senate for Three Months, Capitol Staff Finally Check Behind the Curtains

Sen. Mitch McConnell’s three-month absence from the Senate due to health recovery has sparked concerns about transparency and his fitness to serve. Critics question the practice of receiving salary without attendance, leading to proposed reforms like mandatory wellness checks. Meanwhile, McConnell’s office insists he’s engaged remotely, raising further questions about the Senate’s operational necessity. Continue reading Mitch McConnell Missing From Senate for Three Months, Capitol Staff Finally Check Behind the Curtains

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
censorship, crime, Crime Beat, Criminal Court, Culture & Absurdity, Entertainment, Government, Hobbies & Things, Judicial, Law Enforcement, Maryland, maryland man, Overreach, Patriotism, Planes, Trains, & Automobiles, Psychos & Crazies, public safety, Stupid White People, Yes, This Is Real

Baltimore County Man Blows Up His Own Cadillac Limo for Birthday, Maryland Responds by Criminalizing Patriotism

A Baltimore County man allegedly celebrated his birthday by blowing up his own Cadillac limo, proving Maryland still produces the kind of citizen who looks at luxury transportation and sees fireworks. Continue reading Baltimore County Man Blows Up His Own Cadillac Limo for Birthday, Maryland Responds by Criminalizing Patriotism

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Congress, Congress & Power, Crypto, democrats, Dysfunctional Technology, Government, Maryland, Politics, Washington absurdity, Washington DC

Chris Van Hollen Demands Clear Crypto Rules, Blocks Bill Called the CLARITY Act

Sen. Chris Van Hollen criticized the crypto industry for operating without clear regulations while simultaneously blocking the CLARITY Act, which aimed to establish such rules. This paradox highlights a common governmental pattern: decrying regulatory gaps yet impeding progress, leaving crypto firms in confusion over future regulations. Continue reading Chris Van Hollen Demands Clear Crypto Rules, Blocks Bill Called the CLARITY Act

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
American Bar Association, censorship, crime, Criminal Court, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Extremist Behaviors, Government, Judicial, Law & Order, Lawfare Warfare, Massachusetts, Online Abuse, People & Personalities, Psychos & Crazies, public safety, social media, Stupid White People

Defense Lawyer’s Wife Launches Unofficial Lindsay Clancy Spin Room Because Apparently the Trial Needed a Family PR Department

In Massachusetts, the defense attorney’s wife is using social media to comment on a high-profile trial, leading to questions about professional boundaries. Her posts analyze jury dynamics and advocate for the defendant, prompting criticism about ethics and optics. Despite no formal rules against her actions, they raise significant concerns. Continue reading Defense Lawyer’s Wife Launches Unofficial Lindsay Clancy Spin Room Because Apparently the Trial Needed a Family PR Department

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Activism, Arts & Entertainment, Celebrity, Culture & Absurdity, Entertainment, Extremist Behaviors, Global News, Government, International, Iran, Military & Foreign Policy, NATO & Global Absurdity, New York, People & Personalities, Protests, Psychos & Crazies, Sex Sells

Yoko Ono Announces Nude Times Square War Protest, Iran Immediately Requests Ceasefire

Yoko Ono allegedly plans to walk nude through Times Square to protest the war with Iran, prompting a bizarre mix of reactions. Some view her act as a potential deterrent, while others question its diplomatic value. In response, Iran has proposed negotiations to avoid the unconventional protest. Continue reading Yoko Ono Announces Nude Times Square War Protest, Iran Immediately Requests Ceasefire

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, business, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, democrats, Government, Government Dysfunction, Government Waste, Overreach, Politics, Sports & Whatever, State & Local

Lt. Gov. Aruna Miller Attends Frederick Keys Playoff Game, Keys Immediately Eliminated

The Frederick Keys’ playoff run ended disastrously with a 7-5 loss to Greensboro after Maryland Lt. Gov. Aruna Miller attended Game 3. Fans suspected her presence led to the defeat, prompting calls for investigation into political interference. Officials denied any connection, yet the incident sparked humor and superstition among local supporters. Continue reading Lt. Gov. Aruna Miller Attends Frederick Keys Playoff Game, Keys Immediately Eliminated

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
9/11, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Extremist Behaviors, Government, National Security, Nationality, remembrance

9/11 Anniversary Ends, Nation Returns To Regularly Scheduled Hatred

After the annual September 11 remembrance, Americans swiftly resumed their divisive behavior, quickly returning to online hostility and political arguments. Reflecting on unity was short-lived, as social media users transitioned from mourning to petty disputes. This cycle of brief reflection before returning to conflict has become a disturbing annual tradition. Continue reading 9/11 Anniversary Ends, Nation Returns To Regularly Scheduled Hatred

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, crime, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Government, Government Dysfunction, Government Waste, Maryland, Politics, State vs. Federal Politics, Urban Absurdity, Washington absurdity, Washington DC

Raskin, Van Hollen Turn Peeling Pool Liner Into Watergate: Aquatic Edition

Maryland lawmakers Jamie Raskin and Chris Van Hollen reacted dramatically after a contractor admitted to flaws in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool renovation. Raskin connected the mishap to broader political conspiracies, assembling investigative teams, while Van Hollen stressed accountability. Meanwhile, a contractor revealed the issue was simply a materials error, but everyone ignored him. Continue reading Raskin, Van Hollen Turn Peeling Pool Liner Into Watergate: Aquatic Edition

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Activism, Congress, Congress & Power, democrats, Democrazy, Extremist Behaviors, Government, Government Dysfunction, Government Waste, immigration, Law & Order, Maryland, Politics, public safety, social media, State & Local, Washington absurdity

Blueberry Fruit Roll-Up Rolls Down to the Canal to Film TikTok About Calling Congress Before ICE Calls You

April McClain Delaney rolls up to the canal in electric blue to film a “Know Your Rights” video, while the Canton Cat wonders whether Congress plans to fix immigration law before the next TikTok. Continue reading Blueberry Fruit Roll-Up Rolls Down to the Canal to Film TikTok About Calling Congress Before ICE Calls You

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
9/11, absurd politics, Culture & Absurdity, Extremist Behaviors, Global News, Government, International, National Security, Phobias, Politics

Terrorists Chanting “Death to America” Reportedly Concerned Americans May Be Developing Negative Impression of Them

Terrorists chanting “Death to America” are reportedly confused about why Americans remain suspicious, forcing the Canton Cat to explain one of history’s more obvious public-relations failures. Continue reading Terrorists Chanting “Death to America” Reportedly Concerned Americans May Be Developing Negative Impression of Them

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment