WASHINGTON — Sen. Chris Van Hollen warned this week that crypto is dangerous because bad actors can exploit regulatory gaps, then reportedly celebrated helping block the bill designed to create clearer rules for crypto.

The Canton Cat stared at the statement for several seconds.

Then knocked the laptop off the table.

“So the problem is lack of clarity, and the solution is to kill CLARITY. Brilliant. No notes.”

Van Hollen argued the bill doesn’t do enough to stop corruption or abuse.

Fair enough.

Normal people might respond by amending it.

Tightening enforcement.

Adding conflict-of-interest rules.

Closing loopholes.

Washington, however, has developed a more sophisticated process:

STEP 1: Complain there are no rules.
STEP 2: Block the rules.
STEP 3: Complain there are still no rules.
STEP 4: Fundraise off the emergency.

The Canton Cat recognizes this technique because it is also how he handles the mouse problem behind the dumpster.

Do nothing.

Yell about it.

Blame somebody else.

Repeat.

Critics of the CLARITY Act say it may be too weak.

Fine.

Then fix it.

But “this bill does not solve literally every crypto problem on Earth, therefore kill it” is how Congress turns temporary uncertainty into a permanent habitat.

At this point, crypto companies may want to stop hiring lawyers and start hiring archaeologists.

They have a better chance of finding the rules buried under Washington than getting Congress to pass them.

Van Hollen says he wants clarity.

He just apparently does not want the CLARITY Act.

At press time, Congress had introduced the Regulatory Certainty Restoration and Enhancement Act, then immediately blocked it because lawmakers remained concerned it might restore regulatory certainty.