FREDERICK, Md. — The Frederick Keys’ playoff run came to an abrupt end Friday after Maryland Lt. Gov. Aruna Miller attended Game 3, prompting local fans to demand an immediate investigation into whether the visit constituted reckless political interference with baseball.

The Keys lost 7-5 to Greensboro, ending their season and confirming what superstitious Frederick residents already suspected:

Annapolis touched it.

Miller posted afterward that it was “great to be in Frederick” and praised the team for bringing the community together.

The Canton Cat nearly coughed up a squirrel.

“You showed up for the deciding playoff game and they lost. Maybe next year send a fruit basket.”

Witnesses say the Keys had spent the season battling opposing pitchers, bad hops, injuries, and the ordinary cruel mathematics of baseball.

Then Maryland government arrived.

Game over.

Fans immediately began constructing a timeline.

Before Lt. Governor arrives: Playoff hopes alive.

Lt. Governor attends: Frederick loses.

Afterward: Inspirational tweet about how winning isn’t everything.

Classic government program.

First the state shows up.

Then the thing stops working.

Then somebody issues a statement celebrating the experience.

Miller even posed with the team and mascot, providing photographic evidence for what future baseball historians will presumably call The Frederick Incident.

State officials denied any connection between Miller’s attendance and the loss, noting that elected officials do not possess supernatural powers capable of altering sporting outcomes.

Maryland taxpayers responded:

“Have you seen what they can do to a budget?”

The Keys should probably take precautions next season.

No politicians in the dugout.

No Annapolis delegations behind home plate.

No ceremonial first pitches from anybody currently empowered to create a task force.

And if Wes Moore appears near the stadium, forfeit immediately and save everyone three hours.

The Canton Cat has already offered to patrol the gates in 2027.

Payment requested in hot dogs.

Cash only.

Absolutely no state grants.