The DNC interviewed nearly 10,000 people who voted in 2020 but stayed home in 2024. Canton Cat interviewed 37 humans, four raccoons and one confused delivery driver behind a Wawa—and somehow got to “everything costs too much” much faster. Continue reading DNC Talks to 10,000 Nonvoters, Canton Cat Talks to 37 People Behind a Wawa and Finds Democrats Have Bigger Problems
Wes Moore is back on the international stage, this time celebrating in Ghana, while Marylanders remain home enjoying their own traditions: rising bills, potholes, tolls and waiting for the governor to circle back. Continue reading Wes Moore Continues International Tour, Maryland Residents Asked to Please Hold
Maryland workers start paying into FAMLI in 2027, while benefits don’t begin until 2028. The Canton Cat investigates Annapolis’ favorite economic model: pay now, maybe later. Continue reading Annapolis Announces Exciting New Benefit: Paying for Something a Year Before You Get It
D.C. Councilmember Janeese Lewis George says statehood is a racial justice issue. The Canton Cat checks the history, the politics, and the dumpster behind the Capitol. Continue reading D.C. Councilmember Discovers 1791 Was Apparently About Her
In Washington, D.C., Democrats are boycotting the State of the Union, opting instead for their own event, “State of the Confederation.” With over 70 lawmakers attending, the parallel broadcast features curated aesthetics and critiques of the Trump administration’s policies. This division highlights modern political optics rather than genuine secession. Continue reading Blue & Gray 2.0: Democrats Announce “State of the Confederation” Watch Party While Trump Delivers State of the Union
Annapolis has fined Snow $1,250 for obstructing bike lanes and sidewalks, highlighting a commitment to climate accountability. While Snow plans to contest the violation, city officials emphasize the importance of impact over intent. A new Seasonal Accountability Task Force will be established to address future issues related to snow and transportation equity. Continue reading Annapolis Takes Bold Climate Action, Fines Snow for Obstructing Bike Lanes
In 2026, rumors circulate that Senator Mitch McConnell has been “functionally offline” while his staff manipulates the legislative process to block the SAVE Act. Various potential puppet masters, including Senate leaders and the parliamentarian, influence actions silently, revealing a system designed to stall bills, suggesting the Senate operates independently of McConnell. Continue reading Capitol Mystery: Is Mitch McConnell Being Operated by Remote Control?
A raccoon in Annapolis has tested positive for rabies, causing concern among residents. The aggressive behavior reported coincided with Hakeem Jeffries’ visit to discuss controversial redistricting plans that could diminish Republican representation. Experts highlight the parallels between rabies and gerrymandering, urging vigilance against aggressive animals and political strategies alike. Continue reading Rabid in Annapolis? Health Officials Confirm Raccoon Case as Hakeem Jeffries Visits to Push Redistricting
A satirical social media post claims Maryland Governor Wes Moore was not elected but “assembled” in a political lab by notable figures like Oprah Winfrey and George Soros. This fictional account suggests Moore was engineered for charisma and political ambition, sparking humorous debates about his authenticity amidst real political concerns in Maryland. Continue reading UNKNOWN WES MOORE REVEALED AS “POLITICAL LAB CREATION,” SOURCES SAY HE WAS GROWN IN A HYDROPONIC TANK BEHIND AN IKEA
Governor Wes Moore announced the Maryland Open-Air Living Initiative, transforming public spaces into “tarp-forward communities” amid critique labeling it tent cities. This satirical plan borrows from California’s housing model, promoting outdoor living while sparking debate on whether reduced enforcement could lead to severe homelessness issues. Critics emphasize the need for comprehensive supportive measures. Continue reading Governor Moore Announces “Maryland Open-Air Living Initiative,” Says Tents Are Just ‘Affordable Vertical Innovation Turned Sideways’
