Tag: American politics

9/11, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Extremist Behaviors, Government, National Security, Nationality, remembrance

9/11 Anniversary Ends, Nation Returns To Regularly Scheduled Hatred

After the annual September 11 remembrance, Americans swiftly resumed their divisive behavior, quickly returning to online hostility and political arguments. Reflecting on unity was short-lived, as social media users transitioned from mourning to petty disputes. This cycle of brief reflection before returning to conflict has become a disturbing annual tradition. Continue reading 9/11 Anniversary Ends, Nation Returns To Regularly Scheduled Hatred

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
9/11, absurd politics, Community Guidelines, Cultural Meltdowns, Culture & Absurdity, Extremist Behaviors, Gangs & Cults, immigration, Internet Meltdowns, Nationality, Online Abuse, Politics, Protests, Psychos & Crazies, social media

9/12/2001 Remains Last Known Sighting of National Unity; Authorities Request Tips

Federal authorities have reopened a cold case regarding the disappearance of national unity in America, last seen on September 12, 2001. Investigators share sightings of unity were often disappointing and suggest the internet may be to blame. Citizens are encouraged to check for signs of unity, which remains elusive and possibly hiding under alternative names. Continue reading 9/12/2001 Remains Last Known Sighting of National Unity; Authorities Request Tips

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
democrats, Democrazy, Satire

The People’s State of the Onion

Democrats recently launched the People’s State of the Onion, an alternative to the State of the Union that emphasizes emotional expressions over factual reporting. Sponsored by various activist groups, it aims to critique the current presidential administration while hosting by influential figures. This approach raises questions about political norms and the acceptance of election results. Continue reading The People’s State of the Onion

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Democrazy, Politics, Satire, Sports & Whatever

No Escaping the Scoreboard: How American Sports Hijacked Budget Season

The intertwining of sports and politics has grown pronounced, with lawmakers increasingly referencing sports culture during discussions on budget and fiscal discipline. Instead of productive debates, sessions resemble chaotic sporting events, with bipartisan jabs and metaphorical excess. Ultimately, budgets are passed amid a backdrop of disillusionment, leaving the national debt unaddressed. Continue reading No Escaping the Scoreboard: How American Sports Hijacked Budget Season

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Arts & Entertainment, Bach's Boombox, Donald Trump, Entertainment, Washington absurdity

TrumpTix: President Trump Announces Ticketing Platform to “Make Concerts Great Again”

President Trump is launching TrumpTix, a ticketing platform aimed at reducing high service fees and improving transparency in ticket pricing. The initiative promises features like “Freedom Fee” and fair distribution of tickets. While it targets concerts, sports, and political events, industry reactions range from shock to cautious optimism about affordability. Continue reading TrumpTix: President Trump Announces Ticketing Platform to “Make Concerts Great Again”

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
2026 Midterms Guide, Elections, Politics, Satire, State vs. Federal Politics, virginia

From Cell Block to Capitol Hill: Inmate Announces Congressional Run, Promises to “Shake Up Washington”

A Virginia Beach inmate, serving time for abduction and rape, has launched an unconventional congressional campaign from prison, emphasizing his “real-world experience” with the justice system. His agenda includes criminal justice reform, transparency, and a grassroots outreach strategy. The campaign raises questions about ethics and eligibility in politics. Continue reading From Cell Block to Capitol Hill: Inmate Announces Congressional Run, Promises to “Shake Up Washington”

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Minnesota

Walz of Fury: Minnesota Governor Appears to Challenge Entire Planet to a Fight

Minnesota Governor Tim Walz appears to be challenging the entire country to a fight—political, rhetorical, and possibly imaginary—as he squares off against everyone from national figures to the latest talking-point mascot, all while critics say the fury looks less like courage and more like a very loud distraction. Continue reading Walz of Fury: Minnesota Governor Appears to Challenge Entire Planet to a Fight

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Global News, Greenland, Media Critique, Politics, Satire

NEW YORK POST EXPANDS EMPIRE, LAUNCHES “GREENLAND POST” AHEAD OF HISTORIC 51ST STATEHOOD

The New York Post is launching The Greenland Post, a tabloid focused on Greenland following renewed interest from President Trump. It aims to deliver straightforward Arctic coverage with eye-catching headlines. The paper reflects a humorous take on governance, promising content tailored to its audience without hiring local journalists, relying instead on remote reporting. Continue reading NEW YORK POST EXPANDS EMPIRE, LAUNCHES “GREENLAND POST” AHEAD OF HISTORIC 51ST STATEHOOD

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
absurd politics, Government Dysfunction, immigration, Maryland, Politics, State vs. Federal Politics

Sen. Van Hollen Horrified to Learn Illegal Immigrants May Not Be Receiving Luxury Resort Experience in Baltimore

Sen. Chris Van Hollen is demanding answers regarding the treatment of illegal immigrants in federal custody, expressing concern over their lack of luxury amenities. Critics argue his focus on migrants neglects pressing issues for American citizens. A proposed “Margaritas for Migrants” bill aims to address this perceived humanitarian crisis humorously. Continue reading Sen. Van Hollen Horrified to Learn Illegal Immigrants May Not Be Receiving Luxury Resort Experience in Baltimore

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment
Government, immigration, Law & Order, Law Enforcement

100+ Million Americans Safely Avoided Being Shot by Federal Agents This Week by Doing Something Extraordinary: Not Ramming Them With Their Cars or Waving a Gun Around

In a remarkable display of national restraint, hundreds of millions of Americans survived the week unharmed by doing something radical: not pointing guns at federal agents, not ramming them with cars, and not turning routine enforcement encounters into Darwin Awards. Continue reading 100+ Million Americans Safely Avoided Being Shot by Federal Agents This Week by Doing Something Extraordinary: Not Ramming Them With Their Cars or Waving a Gun Around

Unknown's avatarMichael PhillipsLeave a comment