ANNAPOLIS — Maryland Attorney General Anthony Brown has once again heroically protected the state from its greatest natural predator: a federal policy he dislikes.

Brown announced another lawsuit against the Trump administration Wednesday, this time over endangered-species regulations, bringing Maryland one step closer to replacing its Attorney General’s Office with a giant red button labeled:

“SUE TRUMP.”

Staff reportedly slap it every morning before coffee.

“Immigration? Sue him. Housing? Sue him. Nuclear rules? Sue him. Frog looks nervous? Get me twenty attorneys general and a press conference.”

The endangered-species case arrives as Brown continues his ambitious effort to ensure no Trump administration action survives more than 72 hours without Maryland demanding a federal judge stop it.

Sources inside the office say the process is now almost entirely automated.

Trump signs order.

Brown tweets outrage.

Coalition forms.

Complaint filed.

Maryland taxpayer bends over.

Repeat.

At this point, Brown’s office does not appear to have a legal strategy so much as a subscription to Democratic Attorneys General Mad Libs.

“The Trump administration has recklessly ________, threatening Maryland’s ________, and I will not stand idly by.”

Possible answers include:

“enforced immigration law,”
“changed a regulation,”
“looked at a wetland funny,”
or “existed.”

Brown emphasized that Maryland is home to numerous federally protected animals and plants.

The Canton Cat supports protecting endangered species, particularly whichever species still has enough disposable income to pay Maryland taxes after Annapolis finishes with it.

One state employee reportedly suggested adding “Maryland taxpayer” to the endangered list, but environmental officials rejected the proposal because researchers were unable to locate enough surviving specimens.

Meanwhile, Brown’s office dismissed criticism that taxpayers are funding an endless partisan courtroom war.

“This is about protecting Maryland,” a spokesperson said while feeding another stack of billable hours into a wood chipper.

Asked whether the Attorney General might someday spend an entire week addressing Maryland problems instead of Donald Trump, the spokesperson laughed so hard paramedics were called.

Brown is expected to announce his next lawsuit sometime Thursday morning after Trump changes a lightbulb without conducting an environmental-impact study.

The Canton Cat has obtained an advance copy of the press release:

TRUMP DID SOMETHING.

MARYLAND IS SUING.

PLEASE DO NOT ASK WHAT THIS COSTS.