BALTIMORE COUNTY — Concerned Maryland residents have reportedly begun leaving detergent, quarters, hotel coupons and gently used khakis along Reid Wiseman’s parade route after the Artemis II commander once again appeared in public wearing the same damn blue NASA flight suit.

Wiseman returned to Baltimore County this week for Dulaney High School’s homecoming festivities, serving as grand marshal after commanding Artemis II’s historic trip around the Moon earlier this year. NASA says Wiseman and Victor Glover are transitioning to emeritus status this month, meaning Wiseman was not fired and can continue supporting the agency through mentoring and training.

Marylanders remain unconvinced.

“Reid, buddy,” said one concerned woman holding a Tide Pod. “You went to the Moon in April. It is September. Do you own pants?”

Witnesses say Wiseman has now been spotted at schools, ceremonies, sporting events and community appearances dressed like Mission Control called during breakfast and told him Earth had six minutes left.

NASA maintains that the blue flight suit is traditional astronaut attire.

The Canton Cat maintains that after five straight months it becomes:

A LIFESTYLE CRISIS

Local authorities have opened several possible explanations:

NASA quietly repossessed his closet.

The Orion capsule accidentally returned with all his civilian clothes.

He has been living in Terminal B at BWI.

He believes taking the suit off will cancel the Moon landing.

NASA issued one outfit in 2009 and said, “Make it last.”

Wiseman’s Maryland tour has reportedly become so extensive that state officials are considering installing permanent signs:

ASTRONAUT CROSSING

DO NOT FEED AFTER REENTRY

LAUNDROMAT — 2.4 MILES

CIVILIAN CLOTHING OPTIONAL

At Dulaney’s homecoming parade, Wiseman rode through Baltimore County tossing NASA patches to spectators.

This briefly intensified homelessness concerns after witnesses noticed he appeared to be distributing his remaining possessions from an open vehicle.

“First the patches,” whispered one resident. “Next he’s handing out Tang and asking whether anybody has a couch.”

Baltimore County immediately established the Reid Wiseman Emergency Earth Reintegration Fund, providing returning astronauts with:

One pair of jeans.

Two polo shirts.

A $25 laundromat card.

A map showing that Maryland has places other than Dulaney High School.

And a laminated card explaining:

YOU ARE NO LONGER REQUIRED TO LOOK LIKE YOU ARE ABOUT TO BOARD A SPACECRAFT.

NASA complicated matters further by announcing Wiseman will appear at the Ravens game Sunday as part of its Inspiration Tour.

The Canton Cat has therefore concluded that the suit is no longer clothing.

It is now Maryland’s newest mobile NASA exhibit.

Children may touch it.

Schools may book it.

Baltimore County may eventually put it on the historic register.

Scientists estimate the flight suit has now accumulated enough public appearances to qualify for its own Congressional Space Medal of Honor.

Wiseman already received that medal last month along with the rest of the Artemis II crew after completing the mission’s nearly 10-day lunar journey.

The suit received nothing.

Sources say resentment is growing.

NASA officials have repeatedly assured the public Wiseman has a home, a career legacy, and access to ordinary Earth clothing.

Still, Maryland residents remain prepared.

A GoFundMe titled BUY REID SOME CHINOS reportedly hit $14 million before organizers realized it had somehow become a Montgomery County procurement contract.

Meanwhile, one Timonium dry cleaner has posted a standing offer:

REID: FIRST LOAD FREE.

SECOND LOAD ALSO FREE.

PLEASE.

The Canton Cat attempted to contact Wiseman for comment but was told he was at another Maryland event.

Still wearing blue.

At this point, we don’t need NASA.

We need Tide.